It’s not unusual to experience self-doubts in Life, specially when faced with challenging situations. Today, Life & Business Coach Mentor, and Psychotherapist, Tiya Gorain shares her simple strategies to help you let go of self-doubts and stop being critical of yourself.
What Is Self-doubt?
Self-doubt is a sense of uncertainty about your own abilities or actions. This can be triggered by past failures, negative feedback from others, or by comparing yourself to others. While some level of self-doubt can be healthy, excessive self-doubt can hold you back from achieving your goals and living a fulfilling Life. It's important to change this mindset because it can lead to missed opportunities and a lack of confidence.
If persistent self-doubt is not addressed and remedied, it can become a problem and lead to:
difficulty making daily decisions
emotional instability and unease
feelings of anxiousness or anxiety
low self-esteem and withdrawal
procrastination or a lack of motivation
symptoms of depression
Some level of self-doubt is common, and it is considered fairly normal to question your ability to master brand new or challenging situations. Recognising and challenging this self-doubt, can help you build self-esteem and increase your chances of overcoming it.
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How to Overcome Self-Doubt
Stop selling yourself short. Overcoming self-doubt can be an excellent show of self-care, and such an empowering journey. If self-doubt has been holding you back from taking a leap with your relationships, career or any other aspect of your Life, try these helpful tips to be kinder and more gentle with yourself...
Stop Seeking Validation From Others
It’s a good idea to sometimes ask for people’s advice, feedback and inputs. But if you find yourself always asking for others’ validation and approval before making decisions or taking any steps, it will weaken your faith in yourself and increase your self-doubt.
For example, if you are writing a book or designing a website, and if you keep asking for people’s opinion and changing things according to their suggestions, the end product won’t reflect the true you. It’s alright to take advice but in the end, make sure your decisions are based on what’s right for you and what you truly want.
HELPFUL TIP: Start taking stock of all the wonderful talents, abilities and traits that exist within you. Make a list to reference in future if necessary for those moments when you can sense self-doubt creeping back in.
Stop Comparing Yourself To Other People
We often experience self-doubt because we are scared that we won’t achieve something at the same level as someone else. This can hamper our progress and stop us from achieving success. It’s best to understand that everyone’s journey, circumstances, definition of success etc are different and instead of comparing with others, we should focus on our own journey and achievements. Whether we are happy with our position in Life shouldn’t depend on where other people are at.
Doubt Your Doubts
Our doubts are often not the truth, but what our mind creates fuelled by certain fears. When you start doubting yourself, try to challenge the thoughts. For example before you are about to speak at an event, a small voice in your head might say “What if no one likes your talk? What if the audience laughs at you?”. Challenge this by saying “But what if they love my talk and there is deafening applause when I finish?”.
HELPFUL TIP: Self-doubt is often fear in disguise. Once you expose and identify the fear or limiting beliefs, you can fight back, and move forward by shifting your inner self-talk.
Build A Support Group
Your inner circle either fuels your self-doubts or boosts your self confidence. Try to surround yourself with positive people who believe in you, and will be on your side. People who can remind you of your natural abilities and self-worth when you are unable to do so yourself.
HELPFUL TIP: Remember, you are the sum of those you spend the most time with every day. If you don't have a trusted circle of friends, consider starting a support group for those also going through what you are working on.
Self-doubt doesn't have to hold you back. In fact, if you use it as way to highlight those aspects of yourself and Life that need a little loving attention, it can be an empowering motivation to create positive change in your Life!
→ For Self Care, and more ways to be kinder and loving to yourself, head over to the self care category and discover how to make the habit of putting your needs first, part of your every day!
Guest Blogger, Overcoming Self Doubt
Tiya Gorain is an Australian Life & Business Coach/Mentor and Psychotherapist. She is the founder of Empowered Brave Women Build Futures, which supports every day women, giving them a wellness platform to find support, motivation, and connect through live events, meetups, wellness sessions and workshops. Learn more.
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